Subject: The Birth Order of Children - LOL, LOL

THE BIRTH ORDER OF CHILDREN
Their Clothes:

1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN
confirms your pregnancy.

2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.

3rd baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes.
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Preparing for the Birth:
1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously.

2nd baby: You don't bother because you remember that last time, breathing
didn't do a thing.

3rd baby : You ask for an epidermal in your eighth month.
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The Layette :
1st baby: You pre-wash newborn's clothes, color-coordinate them, and fold
them neatly in the baby's little bureau.

2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard
only the ones with the darkest stains.

3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can't they?
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Worries:

1st baby: At the first sign of distress--a whimper, a frown--you pick up
the baby.

2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your
firstborn.

3rd baby: You teach your three-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing.
______________________________________________________
Pacifier:

1st baby: If the pacifier falls on the floor, you put it away until you can
go home and wash and boil it.

2nd baby: When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it off with some
juice from the baby's bottle.

3rd baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in.
______________________________________________________
Diapering:

1st baby: You change your baby's diapers every hour, whether they need it
or not.

2nd baby: You change their diaper every two to three hours, if needed.


3rd baby: You try to change their diaper before others start to complain
about the smell or you see it sagging to their knees.
_________________________________________________
Activities:

1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing, and Baby
Story Hour.

2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.

3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaner.
______________________________________________________
Going Out:

1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home
five times.

2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number
where you can be reached.

3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees
blood.
_____________________________ _________________________
At Home:

1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.

2nd baby: You spend a bit of everyday watching to be sure your older child
isn't squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.

3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children.
______________________________________________________
Swallowing Coins (a favorite):

1st child: When first child swallo ws a coin, you rush the child to the
hospital and demand x-rays.

2nd child: When second child swallows a coin, you carefully watch for the
coin to pass.

3rd child: When third child swallows a coin you deduct it from his
allowance!

:lol:

My sister, who is expecting her 4th has definitely gone through all those stages!!

The first pretty much describes me, except the germophobe part - a kid has got to build their immune system! ;)

:rofl: This is so funny. I'm a bit laid back, so I didn't go first baby stage all the way. :whistle:

Hilarious!!! My Mom went through that....

Personally, I hope to start around #2....

My mom did that exact thing with the pacifiers with me and my brothers.

I'm child #1, though, so it's fine with me.

:giggle:

Mine got boiled, Nik's got rinsed, Chris' got wiped on the pants or shirt.

Oh my God, I'm # 6 out of six. I can only imagine what my mother did or didn't do with my pacifier, diapers, etc. I think I'd rather not know!