This has been dogging me for a long time and I'd like to get past this problem so I can move on happily.

OK, here is an example....

There is a course I'd like to do. I apply for the course. I get offered a place and get all excited but then instead of going ahead and doing the course I lose all interest in it and walk away. As a result I've become a serial course applicationist!

I have an interest in something ie cross-stitch. I get excited and enthusiastic about it. But, once I found out how to do it, I get really bored with it and abandon it.

So, here I am, I feel stuck. I feel I can't get interested or excited about anything because what follows is boredom and walking away. So instead of going ahead and doing something I'd really like to do I'm standing still.

I'm my own worst enemy, stopping myself from progressing.

Can anyone identify with any of this or give me some advice?

Oh mirp!! :hug:

Sounds like me, weeks before my depression was officially diagnosed. Medication helped.

I kinda get this way too from time to time .... I think of if as my
"Life is Beige" syndrome. I'm looking for pretty spots of color
in a beigey/grey world but when I find the color, it immediately
starts fading ....

For me, I've been thinking that I just need a change (which is
often easier said than done) ... of scenery or of what I'm doing or ?

I'm sure this isn't helping much, but I think I do understand what you mean :hug:

Okay, I have this excellent book that addresses exactly this type of behavior in people. I really enjoyed it. Anyone up for a ring?

The Practicing Mind

I'm completely with you, mirp. I have stuck with very few things in my life. I might have ditched bookcrossing a long time ago were it not for the friends I've made along the way. Maybe that would help? If you find someone to sign up for courses or take up a hobby with you for support?

Well I'd be interested in it. What did you get out of the book yourself.

When it comes to people joining stuff with me, I'm very much alone. I seem to be surrounded by people who are too busy or have such low self esteem that they won't try anything new...and that's just my family. So I'm kinda swimming against the tide on my own.

I wouldn't say I'm depressed (I'm on meds) but this whole issue is sending me down that road (does that make sense!)

No point speaking to any of my family or friends cause all they say is 'it'll sort itself out', 'it's a sign you're not well enough to do anything', 'why would you want to change anything', you get the idea!

(((mirp))) :hug: I'm not like that but I do have depression and anxiety issues.

The main point the author makes is that rather than enjoying the process of doing something, we stress ourselves out over the end result we expect and that's what causes us to quit.

I really thought it made a lot of sense!

I tend to do this too. Go whole hog into something and loose interest. While we were in the process of getting my middle son diagnosed with ADD I looked at the symptoms and found that I also have ADD (although that is a self diagnosis and haven't talked to the doctor about it). I had 8 of 10 of the "indicators". Afterward my mom mentioned to me that one time way back in 6th grade one of my teachers noticed this as well. Of course 100 years ago they didn't call it ADD and because I wasn't a "problem" or have "behavior issues" nothing was ever done.

You really should talk to your doctor. It could also be the meds you are taking.

:hug: I hope you feel better soon!!!!

maintaining my concentration and enthusiasim is difficult. I get bored really easily...which doesn't help.

You can put my name down for the ring, sounds like I could do with reading that book.

If no one else is interested, I'll definitely reserve it for you, mirp.

I'd like to read that book, too, but it should definitely go to mirp first.




As for the bigger question, mirp, it may be that you are depressed. It might be worth it to find a therapist/counselor/psychologist to talk to... even if they determine that you are not clinically depressed, they may be able to suggest things to help you with what you're going through

thanks breeni.


I suffer from depression. It's five years since I had a nervous breakdown.

At the moment I'm doing really well, it's just this one issue that seems to be holding me back.

I'm a big believer in B vitamins, hugs, sunshine and chocolate. For ADD issues, I'd try Feingold before prescriptions. Then if the problem persists, start thinking pharmaceuticals.
Another issue may be perfectionism. I was taught if you
couldn't be one of the best, you shouldn't do it. This has kept me from trying
a lot of things, and led me to quit a lot more when in fact, practice would have made me average at whatever and that should have been just fine.

:waves: Hi Mirp!!

I don't really have any input for you but I just wanted to tell you it's nice to see you around here again :)

hey sweetie :waves:

I've been around just not posting.


I really don't know much about ADD.

Perfection is a factor I think. I also have a learned sense of low self esteem which I get from my parents.

I'm confused. :blink:

Aren't we all? :wacko: And about the time I start to figure it all out, the rules
change. So not to sound like a sappy card, but try to love alot, laugh alot,
pet animals, make babies laugh, and be kind to others and most of all, to
yourself. :kiss:

Wow rannie, I can't believe how much you sound like me. One of the ways I like to sign cards and other correspondence is

Live, Love, Laugh, Be....

It's kind of the way I try to live my own life. Though I do set long term goals to give me something to work towards, on a day-to-day basis, I totally live for the moment.

Mirp, I've always had more anxiety issues than depression, except for a few years back when I went through a major depression. But I just want to say that truly embracing the concept that rannie brought up, and living for the moment can sorta give you a new outlook on life.

It ties in well to what Breeni mentioned with the book too. Instead of getting all caught up in the end result (the future), live for today. And look at life not as "she who dies with the most money wins. :nono: But instead, she who dies with the most smiles, friends, and happy memories!"

Life is just a big long game, to enjoy as much as you can! Embrace that, along with the other suggestions you've gotten here, and it'll go a long way towards shifting your life outlook!

This might sound really stupid, so if it does, feel free to ignore it. Maybe you should try volunteering someplace. Walk the dogs at a shelter (you get a workout, dogs don't expect perfection, and they aren't at all afraid of rejection! :) ), or spend a day at a food pantry. Most places will take help whenever you can manage (so that would eliminate the "dropping out" factor). Today I spent the morning at a food pantry and it was amazingly uplifting. I just read books in Spanish (really BAD Spanish) to kids while they were waiting with their parents. (Ok, so a 7-year-old corrected my pronunciation for an hour ... it was humbling, but really funny!)

That said, I need to follow my own advice. I was not volunteering this morning, but was there for a work-related photo shoot. I wouldn't want mislead anyone and sound like I'm this great volunteer ... I was getting paid. :blush:

mirp -I think I know exactly how you feel! I'm always finding this or that "latest, greatest thing" and not following through. Right now it's a school application that's gathering dust on my desk. Before that it was taking a leadership role in a new online group (then letting it fade). This even happens in my daily life - I dive into projects at work, then they never get finished.
It all started after I had a big meltdown in late 1999, so maybe it was a similar trigger event to the nervous breakdown you mentioned. Argh. It's so frustrating. I know I'm perfectly healthy and capable of things, but I just can't quite bring myself to stick to tasks/assignments.
I've often thought a support group might help - a small circle of kind souls you could unload your daily/weekly/monthy to-do list on, or mention your big goals to...if everyone's in the same boat, it's a lot easier to know how to motivate and support. Anyone interested in a small e-mail listserv? I've got several other lists I run, so it'd be a snap to set up something private, or by invite only.

sounds like we're kindred souls. I'd love to take part in a little group.


Regarding Voluntary Work, I am a volunteer in Dublin Zoo.

I can relate mirp - I have started various courses and never finished them. Learnt to knit, got halfway thru a square..... joined the gym went once....it's really odd I can be dead motivated about some things, but others I let slip. I stayed with one employer for 14 years, cos I was too unmotivated and had too low self esteem to do anything about it....

And then one day I just quit my job!

I guess there are a few things I have found helps and I'm not saying I always follow these but I try to change little things and I try to do it one a week or one a month. And I went to a positive thinking class and learnt NLP (Neuro-linguistic Programming) which was cool and a bit helpful. And I found cognitive Behaviour Therapy very very useful in terms of depression and treating the underlying self esteem issues I had.

AND last year I stopped taking anti depressants after about 11 years of them! I've felt better since - it was a struggle to come off them, but I've slept better, felt less tired and more motivated since.

You probably haven't found the right thing to do yet.... I'm dead lucky that I mostly have jobs that I really love so that keeps me pretty occupied :D I hope you find something that holds your interest. Being easily bored is a curse isn't it? I think many of us suffer this, which is why we are such swap junkies! :hug: